New Bern, NC — Bartholomew Schwartz, preaching minister of Christ’s Fundamentalist Church of the Low Country, announced to his congregation Wednesday that the Holy Spirit convicted him of being too serious about unimportant issues. “It happened while I was on my morning prayer walk through the neighborhood. I was asking the Lord to show me his heart when I noticed a couple of kids pointing and laughing at me. At first I was enraged at their disrespect, but then I noticed I had forgotten to put on pants before leaving the house. I knew this was the Lord teaching me to laugh again.”
After a short conversation with a passing patrol car, Pastor Schwartz returned home and immediately unsubscribed to Steven Anderson’s YouTube channel. “In the past, I would look down my nose at a man in public with no pants, but now I know the Lord can use indecent exposure to change people’s hearts.”
As a result of this revelation Schwartz plans to try a variety of wardrobe changes in a future sermon series entitled Naked Before the Lord.