Charlotte, NC – NBA officials recently announced the removal of the NBA All-Star Game from the city of Charlotte. The decision was in opposition to the North Carolina law that requires men and women to use bathrooms, locker rooms, and shower facilities consistent with their sex at birth.
Following the decision, NBA officials realized the inconsistency with keeping the NBA and WNBA separate. In a statement, the NBA said, “In the interest of gender equality, we need to let men and women share the same court and locker rooms.”
Dennis Rodman said, “I have been fighting for player equality since the 1990’s. Do you think Jordan and Pippen just let it slide when I went prancing around in a wedding dress? I’m just glad that today’s NBA is far more open-minded than it was back then.”
Following the move, analysts allege that the NBA and WNBA player pay gap and the low WMBA TV ratings will be solved by the eventual return of all male players. Also, there will be no more embarrassment when the WNBA players are fined for political expression while the organization makes a political statement.
When asked to comment on these allegations, Michael Jordan responded, “I don’t have time for this. I’m too busy taking a public stand on an important issue for the first time in my life. It takes a lot more energy than I thought.”
By The Bald Prophet and Dustin Fulton