Rio de Janeiro, Brazil – Since Michael Phelps and Usain Bolt are approximately 30 years old, and entering their final Olympics, they have decided to identify as women to compete against the ladies.  Phelps said, “We are getting old, and the Olympic committee permits this if our estrogen levels are good, so why not?”  Bolt elaborated, “Yeah, I have been eating lots of soy to keep the levels up.”

We asked if it was a problem that Phelps’ world record in 100 meter butterfly was about 5 seconds faster than the female record, and Bolt’s 100 meter was about 1 second faster. Olympic officials explained this is completely fair:  “They say they are women now, so we take their word for it.”


Photo Credit: Dustin Cox Photography via Compfight cc


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