Petersburg, KY — According to a spokesman at Answers In Genesis, Ken Ham has “definitively proven” the Young Earth Theory of creation and the debate is now “over.” As a long time advocate of a Young Earth, Ham states, “There’s really no debate. It’s not like words can change meaning depending on the context. Truth is truth. The Bible says it’s a young earth, and I believe in the Bible. Case closed.” After years of providing “Answers” on tough questions regarding: human origins, evolution, and velociraptors, Ham has proven his theory. “I’ve written dozens of books, and each of them use all the right arguments. There can be no other conclusion.”

Now that Ham has solved this dilemma once and for all, he is all set to write books exclusively about dinosaurs and Noah’s Ark. The press release for his upcoming book states, “This book is going to be bigger than the Leviathan!” The book will come with a 12 pack of trading cards featuring dinosaurs and other animals. “The goal is to try to get 2×2 of every animal to complete your set,” said Ham.

When asked about literary genre and Ancient Near East literature, Ham replied, “I only need the Bible. That’s all the literature I need! This debate is finished!”

Bill Nye was unavailable for comment.

By Anonymous


 

Photo credit:  John Foxe (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

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