Savannah, GA — After accepting a copious amount of Pentecostal and Charismatic students for the school year, Independent Bible College – a cessationist leaning school – decided to try and convert them from their satanic ways.

Many students applied and came to attend because of low tuition fees, but failed to research the school’s beliefs or confused the school with the Assemblies of God affiliated Independent College of the Bible.

The college attempted to convert these students from Satanism and prevent any cult activities with an official inquisition. First, financially; all students attempting to drop out would be forced to pay full tuition. Second, reasonably; every chapel sermon was about “spiritual gifts” today being the work of demons. Third, through threat of punishment; anyone caught speaking in tongues or “slaying someone in the Spirit” would be given a demerit and considered for expulsion. Fourth, by crushing their spirits; all worship in the chapel was limited to traditional Caucasian styles of standing, singing, and being unsure of what to do with one’s hands – raising of hands in the air being allowed only on special occasions. And finally, through ridicule; students were required to mock videos of Benny Hinn services set to Drowning Pool’s song “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor.”

President of the college, Jason Peters, told us that the program was going well and they were meeting their goal of brainwashing their students into the only Christians in the world.

By Justin Schwartz


Photo Credit: C2Ministry via Compfight cc

2 thoughts on “Cessationist Bible College Attempts to Convert Pentecostals and Charismatics

  1. Thanks, Eric! The Gaither’s “He Touched Me” has been tainted for me…for life. I should have put that in there too.


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