Toronto, ON – After repeatedly searching the refrigerator in her home, Kim Wu was unable to find the bottle of ranch dressing to complete her freshly made chef salad. After announcing to her husband Li Wei, “Jesus Christ! I can’t find the ranch dressing” and looking intently in the refrigerator, she immediately noticed the bottle of ranch in the refrigerator door; it was beside the barbeque sauce and next to the mustard. Kim told us, “It was as if the ranch appeared to me only after saying those words out loud. God was testing me. I realize now that I was only able to find the ranch after ‘naming it’ and then use it on my salad after ‘claiming it.’ This revelation opened my heart and mind to the power of affirmative words. My salad was truly anointed. Ever since then, I’ve been a ‘name it and claim it’ Christian.”

Kim also recently found her car keys in her pants pocket after praying to St. Anthony of Padua, the patron saint of lost articles. “I don’t believe in coincidences,” she told us. “I have built my theology upon the ‘ranch revelation’ and whatever works. Praise be to Jesus, Buddah, and the Flying Spaghetti Monster.”

By Justin Schwartz


Photo Credit: rhanley315 via Compfight cc

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